I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Randomize
