"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Randomize
