Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I want to fling myself into the sun
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
