Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I'm eating all of the evidence.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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