Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
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