my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize
