What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
