I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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