I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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