it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize