thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
