I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize