so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
