If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
porn star boner night. come get it.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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