i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
