I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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