She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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