..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
