Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
