dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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