dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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