i just made my gag reflex go away.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
