what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I look better un-naked...
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
