Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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