and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
