Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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