nut hugger
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
