Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
