I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
