Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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