Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize