i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
