If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
