And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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