My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize