Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
