Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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