Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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