I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
