i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
