I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize