i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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