whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
