Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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