Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
