i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Even my vagina gasped.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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