I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
