I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
