Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
