My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
