O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
